A Halloween message from the crypt

Down in a dark place
deep and dank
something stirred
something rank
it writhed and it twisted
it slithered and it slimed
and in its eye
dread evil shined
then up it crawled
and with a shuddering scream
it opened it's maw
and said
"Happy halloween !"

Oh and before I forget - here are some tips for a pleasant Halloween

1. Be very careful when roasting your nuts by the fire - it's much safer just to dress warmly.

2. The best pumpkins come in pairs and should be firm when squeezed.

3. When ducking for apples remember to breathe in before you put your head under water - not after.

4. If you find yourself getting chased by a horny devil don't run too fast or I'll never catch you.

5. If you see a strangely dressed beast mimicking your every move then - before calling the exorcist - check for the possibility that you are drunk and looking at yourself in the mirror.

6. Witches do not take kindly to being referred to as "ugly old hags" - the politically correct term these days is "aesthetically challenging older female". In fact the term Witch is better avoided - the modern pc job title equivalent is "Supernatural Process Operative" or "Prince and Toad exchange mechanic".

Evil greets to all my readers
from The Bunc